Checking in here, I find a few kind comments and only the one post so far this year, from January. That's perfectly disgraceful! Call myself a blogger! Etc.
So I will be posting any second now.
Some keen observation around these parts makes me doubt the scientific validity of 'any second now.' You would think that 'any second' genuinely means any second, and that the word 'now' would skew the probability to favour sooner seconds rather than later seconds. But I have heard people say they will get up any second now, or tackle their homework any second now, and experience tells me that they are implicitly excluding the early range of available seconds, thus ruining the necessary randomness suggested by the word 'any.'
Sometimes I have not seen the actual getting up take place for hours, or the actual homework for days.
But I guess what happened is that I got caught up in all the 2017 hoo-ha about President David Brent taking office in the USA and got with the zeitgeist, becoming vegan and crusading against plastic and trying to uphold rights, and indeed I am still busy with all that, and hope you are too, but these are my elevenses.
For decades now I've had the vaguest notion, like yourself, of writing a book. Something that will fly off the eye-level shelves, perhaps 'The Hue-Chooser's Daughter: a Guide to Land Rover Restoration' or some annotated minutes from meetings I've had the great pleasure to attend.
But the years chug past, and I am in my forties, although I don't consider them to be 'my' forties, but rather forties that someone else has gracelessly foisted upon me with an exhortation not to stay up for them. So I am thinking now that I will bypass the cinema screen and go straight to DVD, as it were, by writing the condensed version of my book. This approach avoids the nitty-gritty of character-development and nuance, and frees me to hone in on plot-line. No doubt there are fine plots on the internet that I can steal. And there we are.
Golf-playing honchos of the Reader's Digest who are reading this, I invite you to get in touch now. The Condensed Books Commissioning Editor, the CEO or other C-Level executives only please: someone who is empowered to sign the uncondensed cheques. I am here ready to put down my doughnut the very second the phone rings.