Monday, April 5, 2010






How frequently are you asked questions?

Not very frequently at all. Maybe three times since I started blogging. I'm proud to have the sort of know-it-all reader who doesn't need to ask.


Will you promote my product on your blog?

I will, but only if it's something august such as Roman Ruins and you make it worth my while.

How much is your while worth?

Three thousand euros a day, plus expenses.

Will that be enough?

It will.

How do you fit blogging into your busy day?

I skimp on my Beauty Regime in order to blog. I used to dither in front of the array of shampoo bottles every morning, wondering whether to go for vivacious colour or uplifting volume. Choosing took a good 10 minutes. Now I just grab a random shampoo.

Have you been disappointed by your hair as a result?

No, my hair doesn't look any different. On non-blogging days I like to settle down with the laptop and a cup of tea, browsing nostalgically through old photos of myself and trying to determine whether it was a vivacious colour or an uplifting volume day.

It's been five days since you commented on my blog. Why is that?

The outsourced team of commentators is on strike, demanding more pay and shorter working hours.

Will you humour them?

No, we can't afford to. Meanwhile, I myself will comment on your blog, in verse.

This sort of stuff isn't getting us anywhere. Where is the lifestyle? Where are the recipes, the soft furnishings, the charming images of children at play?

We're living a Lifestyle-Free Life here for a week, as an experiment. We're eating from matching crockery, not making any vintage finds, upcycling nothing and generally shunning pastels. Our cake-stands are in storage. It's day three now, and we're hitting the wall. Pink Daughter has asked when she may have her Farrow & Ball paint-chart back. Please send cookies.

[You will find another small batch of FAQs here.]

51 comments:

  1. You are freakin' hilarious, mise!!!! Thanks for the laughs! What makes you so creative?

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  2. The best FAQ I have read without a doubt - you must link to it on your sidebar. Thoroughly impressed with the flower installation too.

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  3. Oh Mise, we always seem to post at the same time. I think it must be something to do with the lunar cycle? We're biodynamic. These FAQ are perfect. They answer everything that I ever wanted to ask you. I'll send off a batch of cookies tomorrow with blue smarties in half and pink smarties in the other half.

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  4. Q: What has this got to do with chocolate?

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  5. Gin would be more effective than cookies- or Bach's rescue remedy!

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  6. I can't even tell you how much this blog post made my day. Thank you for honoring the lovely world of interior design while simultaneously recognizing the idiocy of such honoring.

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  7. oh yes! i think a focus week on contraband and other things children aren't allowed would be wonderful - I might take up a few dirty habits....

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  8. "No, my hair doesn't look any different."...doesn't that just say it all? We spend so much time and does it even matter? We are who we are... Better to spend time blogging. Enjoy your Lifestyle-Free Life week ; )

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  9. Love your installation. Damien Hirst would be proud.

    Uplifting volume indeed. Shampoos must be the biggest con in the world. Do any of them make any difference at all?

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  10. Your posts always make me smile. Are you by any chance related to Mrs Mills from The Sunday Times Ettiquette column? Similar sense of humour :)

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  11. I promise I will gouge out the eyes of the gorgeous guy in Aveda who promised me my limp blond hair would gain volume if I bought their volumising shampoo. May I borrow a couple of those beautiful roses for his burial ceremony. Left with no other shampoo choice - what will be my OWN excuse for not blogging frequently? Certainly not having a real job, for sure!!

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  12. Clair, for many a year I have suspected Mrs Mills is Mise, or vice versa. She denies it though.

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  13. stunning floral typography AND a white wooden bedroom floordoes not a lifestyle free blog posting make !

    It must be day 4 now. Are you ok?

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  14. ah mise i nearly took wake with the laughter of this one...

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  15. Guess you had a deprived Easter!!

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  16. I've decided that my next craft project will be to print out posts from your blog and use them to wallpaper my bathroom. This particular post will be placed strategically for pleasure reading. I will, of course, intersperse your posts with images of cabbage roses, windswept fields, coffee cups on old wooden tables, sunshine glinting through branches, women in glorious shoes posing beneath (or on or wearing) chandeliers. My bathroom will thus become the coolest mood board ever.

    You rock my world.

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  17. Oh my goodness, that floor installation is too much! You made an exception to the no lifestyle rule for flower arranging, I see. It's ok, everyone slips up, Mise. The lifestyle habit is a hard one to break. Enjoy the rest of your week!

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  18. Hey, humour those workers! Indulge Pink Daughter! Live those pastels!

    Actually, your lifestyle-free week sounds a bit like January and February for me. Does you good...

    Thanks for your kind words about my mum.

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  19. You are so clever that I am humbled and un-able to come up with a clever comment.

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  20. Your installation is superb. Your words, as usual, made tea come out of my nose. I think I may have snorted. Like a piglet. (Not a cute, dainty one either.)

    Lovely work.

    xoox,
    -maria

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  21. I wish I could make tea come out of my nose, Vintage.

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  22. Thanks for the comment re the sellotape - some folk sellotape their flowers to the wall - less likely to get trampled on. Try it once the lifestyle free period is over!

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  23. Your world is so pretty. My world is plainer and mooches around the swings coveting your scattered cushions and resolving to get serious about the dusting next week.

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  24. I guess you won't be needing that cupcake cloche after all. Good decision. After a week of Life-style Free living, can we expect a more Tracey Emin inspired installation? Can't wait.

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  25. Dear Mise,
    My blog is feeling decidedly silly now !! Mind you, I've never done a post on shampoo. .... YET !!
    Please tell Pink Daughter that Auntie Jackie has at least 10 Farrow and Ball paint charts and one will be winging its way to her..post haste !!

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  26. Mise, you astound me. In a good way, of course.

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  27. Hey Gorgeous - such a fab post. Especially the bit about the team of outsourced commentators. I'll never look at your comments over @ The Hedge in quite the same way!!
    Millie ^_^

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  28. You are one heck of a writer and I love you for that and more...you are one clever girl...A witty take on some of the more common place things we find here...loved the flower FAQ layout and photo. I'm all for "no Lifestyle" you could start NL Weds..Just a blank blog...

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  29. Hurrah Hurrah!!! you're hysterical!!!

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  30. Very enlightening set of FAQ's.

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  31. Q: Why has Blogger eaten the lovingly crafted verses I left as comments on some of your recent posts? :-(

    You know I've always liked your hair - especially when you're running a giveaway, it always has extra vivacity and volume at those times x

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  32. Loved this, made me giggle!

    Rachel Kay
    x

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  33. It has come to my attention in the form of a thought that just struck me

    It must be day 6 now.....are you alright?

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  34. You make me laugh out loud and one day when I develop my own sense of humor I would like it to be like yours. I also have a similar problem when it comes to shampoo.

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  35. Just looked up Hope and Benson...had never heard of them....oh my goodness....I am very much in love!!! Child in a sweetie shop!! Just wish I could afford them all!! Cx

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  36. I love the answer: I skimp on my Beauty Regime in order to blog. Hilarious!!

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  37. Dear Mise
    What Becky said!! You have got to be the funniest person in blogland... and that flower FAQ is fantastic!!

    Thanks for your lovely comment [too kind!] ... you know blogger has been eating my comments lately so I've been on a blogging break... maybe I should hire your outsource team... Have a great day xxx Julie

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  38. How'd you get to be so funny? I love this post. Good stuff!!! -Jami

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  39. All right then, I call shenanigans on this post!

    It is a known fact that one cannot claim to be Lifestyle-free, while at the same time wistfully arranging flowers into letters on one's bedroom floor. You, madam, have engaged in a blog-worthy Lifestyle activity!

    **hmph**

    False advertising, that.

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  40. too flipping funny, love it.

    and any girl that drinks g&t from a tinny is welcome on a road trip with me any day.

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  41. How I love a good blog catchup with your blog Mise. I know you know it, but you are hilarious!! How is your hair today?? And I'm only sorry it has been 5 days since I commented on your blog. Will make up for lost time I promise!

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  42. fantastic. I love your FAQ's!

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  43. Just read this! You're too funny Mise!!! :-D

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  44. So I found your blog, had a wander - realised that while driving the coast near the delightful Galway I had not photographed your quaint Irish signs, merely moaned about them as we drove in circles and also didn't gather any bog-cotton for my apothecary jars.... ah next time. Then I read your FAQs, learned nothing in a very delightful way and promptly signed up as a follower... thank you for having me. Ann x

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  45. That's the prob with google reader - we don't see the sidebar! Loving these faq

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  46. Best blog ever.... Love your sense of humour.

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  47. I have just come back here for a pick me up,! As Raphaele said, thanks for the good laugh.

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  48. I just came across your site... awesome. I was looking at the entry from Wednesday, August 10, 2011 where I saw your Wildflower plates. I'd like to know where you found them/who makes them... name of pattern.

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