Sunday, April 11, 2010

the bearable lightness of being

International Bonne Maman jam sales figures rocketed this weekend when one commentator went out and bought a jar (apricot) as a result of my latest post. Have you ever had that feeling that you've Made a Difference?


Here are your ideas for the jam jars:
  • Refill with jam (I really overlooked the obvious here)
  • Make candles (a good blogger would)
  • Hold a giveaway
  • Fill them with pearl buttons, rice, cotton wool balls and flour ONLY (if it's not white, it's not fabulous)
  • Mix and transport martinis (this is the suggestion that'll turn my life around)
  • Make ceiling-lights
  • Swop the red lids with Suzie for green lids
  • Store grandparents
  • Use as photo frames
  • Send them to Rachel Kay's mother
  • Use them as a metaphor for bewilderment
  • Store inferior brands of jam, stray socks, pets, etc.
  • Sell them to finance a blog party
  • Take up Nutella instead of jam
  • Use enigmatically as wedding d├ęcor
  • Shake salad dressing
  • Throw them away and sit around waiting for hate comments (you have to admire Meredith's strength of character)
  • Use as wine glasses (tick)
  • Read the entire back catalogue of Country Living for further suggestions.

Thank you. It's clear to me now that I must fully line a room in my house with shelves of jarred things and sit on a French sofa in the middle with my jar of Martini, hosting the blog party. Open-topped sports cars will fill the front yard and great Eurovision hits of the past will blast through the warm night air as the animated clinking of jars intensifies. Scottish Husband and I, the F. Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald of the metaphor for blogging bewilderment, will take your coats.

40 comments:

  1. Don't worry about the back catalogue of Country Living - I'm working on it!
    Wend

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  2. I love that you compiled all of the answers! I think the martini in a jam jar is pure genius. Just down the hatch then smash the glass. Brilliant.

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  3. You could also use them as 'cullet'. (Google it...)

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  4. The Employment Rights Tribunal got in touch in the last set of comments to point out that I'd omitted the important new sofa management role from the org chart. Here we go again:

    self
    Beatrice the imaginary assistant
    mascot
    outsourced commentators
    Senior sofa manager/ VP of Shelving and Storage
    Queen Mother (awaiting response)
    Consultant Jar Filling Designer (successful application from Jacqueline)

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  5. Ah, this useful compilation has been added to my 'favourites', thank you. Now I just need to figure out which ideas could be successfully applied to my large collection of Chinese takeaway tubs.

    PS You're one of my favourite commentators, you know :-) You think I look young! I love you forever xx

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  6. You could have a jam session with martinis!

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  7. I do believe you have just pioneered Jam Glass chic. Mise, your blogging legacy will live on forever more.

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  8. These suggestions are hilarious AND useful :)

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  9. I'm going to rush straight out tomorrow morning and change my car! And I even have a Spring Ball in the next week at which to break it in before parking it outside your lush porch! Have iced tea ready.

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  10. Who would have thought it--you--the queen of jam jar chic! Surely, you're also the genius for making something from nothing!

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  11. Dear Mise,
    It was certainly wonderful news, to read that I was the successful applicant for the post of Consultant Jar Filling Designer.
    Please consider this comment as my formal acceptence.
    I am pleased to accept your offer of £100,000 per annum. It is a lot less than my normal wage but, to work for such an illusturous company is an honour.
    I am really looking forward to the 12 week training course and think that it will certainly hone my jar filling skills.
    As you mentioned them,I was wondering if past Eurovision songs might be piped into my office as I think that it would really help me create.
    What a delight it will be to work with your ever growing team,
    Yours sincerely,
    Jacqueline

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  12. There is seemingly no end to the creative ideas that these simple jars have inspired. Thanks for sharing them with all of us!

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  13. Mise,
    My mother will be thrilled to know that her martini-in-a-bonne-maman-jar innovation is going to turn your life around. It certainly has turned hers around. When I think back I realize that my family has a long habit of such uses. When my father was alive he drank his martinis from grape jelly jars back in the 1970's, although they were nowhere near as chic--just American brands. My family has really come up in the world since those days.

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  14. love the collaborative list. wine glass is one i've done, but also have used as a lunch box.

    packed it with some left over risotto, chucked in hand bag, went to work.

    my creativity is bent towards wine and food - and the consumption thereof.

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  15. Funny, I still think #1 is the funniest....I would not have thought of that either.

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  16. the jar is not even empty yet and i know what to do with it...hello martini glass. i need to get one now for pooch special k. she would want it that way.
    thx for the other ideas but i'll never use them
    cheers
    ~laura

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  17. Up all night looking but now found said article run by BM themselves so - ideas not in your list - 1) use for plant cuttings and fill jar with shells so you don't see the water - very Country Living, 2)memory jars- fill one for each child with tiny bits from their childhood and give them to them when they leave home to evoke chilhood memories, 3)wish jar - write your hopes and dreams on little letters and envelopes and keep in the jar, 4) JELLY MOULDS (use for pink and blue daughter and show result on blog!), 5, put holes in the top and make a flour dredger.
    (None as ingenious as those from your contributors!) So you dont think I'm all sweetness and light I'm going to bring down the tone by filling one with beer, making a a hole in the lid and using it to trap slugs - stylishly. Now - do I go to bed or go fill jars before work?

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  18. Wow. We are all the most creative, individual, inspired, Martha Stewart-esque, Country Living-like people in all of Blogtopia.

    Some of those suggestions I could not have come up with in a million years.

    But the best, the most classy, is using them as wine glasses. I might surprise my husband with a special dinner using just such implements to drink from. He will be THRILLED> xoxo

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  19. Make that two commentators, Mise. I was terribly disappointed to discover the lid is not actually covered in oversized gingham...

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  20. Thanks for the compilation...I'm tweeting it right now. Random people NEED to know this stuff.

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  21. You've definitely made a difference to me, I can now name these jam jars by brand - you have no idea how that will swell my after dinner conversation. I am looking forward to yet more invites piling up now! And I think grandmothers was a good idea, although where would it stop? I'd hate to have a 'family shelf' as it were.

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  22. Jam Jar chic Mise. But when did I miss the job applications for consultant jar filling designer? I must keep up!!

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  23. Sales of Bonne Maman jam in Tesco (Ballyfermot branch) have gone up by 100%. (Sherry has gone up by 400% but that's another post).

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  24. I like the idea of using them as a metaphor for bewilderment.

    And speaking of Nutella, did you ever add it (or a preferred equivalent) to unsalted rice cakes? That was my top snack-related discovery/innovation of last year.

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  25. enigmatic...ah whisht...would ya schtop a wirra...

    i'm metaphoring my bewilderment this afternoon as i've a pot of elderberry jam i need to finish up this morning...

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  26. What makes me laugh here is the Bombay Sapphire bottle holding the daffs.

    My chap will ONLY drink Bombay Sapphire (no Gordon's for him... I know - expensive times ahead) and so I have these bottles acting as candle holders all round the house.

    A very good job they do too :).

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  27. You know they sell (somewhere, I'm not sure where exactly) rubber lids that fit on these jars so they can be used sort of as tupperware...probably still doesn't use up your stash (which clearly is quite extensive!) but maybe will help you. Can you grow herbs in them or something?

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  28. Congratulations on finally seeing the light at the end of the bonne mamma jar,

    Will you make sure i'm not in the loo when Dana comes on , All kinds of everything is my national anthem.

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  29. See. So much more fun than throwing them out.

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  30. The time has come- you and all your commenters have inspired me. I'm going to get a Lifestyle.

    Collecting these jam jars seems to be a great place to start, since there are so many practical and pretty ways of using them.

    I have a dilemma, though. What am I to do with all the jam?

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  31. Mise...I will forever think of you first everytime I glance upon my lovely jam jars. They have taken on a whole new meaning in my life!

    Jeanne :)

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  32. Wend, jelly moulds are top of the list, and you're a wonder for looking up that article. Everybody, Wend is a wonder.

    Jacqueline, there'll be a lavender sachet as a bonus for every jar you fill.

    Stan, we bought our first Nutella jar a week ago. It's proving too popular. The children have it on their potatoes.

    Jaboopee, hurry, Dana is refusing to sing till you get here.

    Speccy, can you postpone the Lifestyle till I get to the feature on what to do with the empty gin bottles? The gin might be easier to dispose of than the jam, you see. Gin tarts, gin swiss rolls, that sort of thing.

    Lads, I'm off to catch a plane - I'll catch up with you in a week or so. Tara and Shell are custodians of the jam. Magsmcc has a new car if anyone needs a lift to buy more.

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  33. So glad you've found multiple solutions for this very important and often overlooked issue, dear. Rest assured that you've Made a Difference in many ways.

    xoox,
    -maria

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  34. Wow. There really are hundreds of uses for these jars. Merci!

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  35. Goodness,I believe that I am going to have to increase my Bonne Maman jam consumption in order to have enough martini glasses for an evening or two... YOU have made my day - I may just try that one out on an unsuspecting French public yet.
    Lovely week to you MIse

    A

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  36. So, you get on a plane and chaos erupts...

    Enjoy wherever you are, since you may be some time. We'll probably have let standards slip in the meantime and you will be in need of that gin

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  37. I was presuming the worst and thought you'd got stuck in iceland, lovely to see you back....
    you are back aren't you?

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  38. Missing your posts...hope all is okay and that you are simply stuck in Paris with your lovelies drinking wine and contemplating volcanic ash...

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  39. http://mynottinghill.blogspot.com/2009/09/liquor-bottle-soap-pump-not-pourer.html

    Heres another interesting use for Gin!

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You're looking particularly well.

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